Babysitting the Superheroes
by elcapitan-rogers
Summary: AKA one shot about a battalion of superheroes randomly showing up at Sam's doorstep because they have nowhere else to go.
1. Chapter 1

**1 : Honeymoon Destination**

Sam Wilson just came back from his dinner date with a girl he met at work. She was nice and sweet and he really liked her a lot.

After what happened in DC and their unsuccessful mission to find the Winter Soldier, Steve asked him to move to New York with the rest of the Avengers. The Captain and Tony Stark even granted him a place in the team of superheroes. Sam declined it, said he wasn't ready for that big step yet and he needed a big break after what went down in DC.

So Steve and Stark left him with a forever stand invitation to join the team if he bored with this normal life.

He still lived in DC. He still had his place and his job at the VA. No one knew his identity as the Falcon. Well, Steve, Maria and Stark did a very good job in cleaning after the event and Natasha also erased every trace that could trace back to him.

"You need to be able to live your normal life, Sam. No one knows you are the Falcon so we want to keep it that way." Steve said

"Thank, bro."

"Don't thank me. You deserve a normal life, Sam."

"Yeah, and if you want to join our super-secret boy band you can give us a call." Stark told and gave him his business card.

Sam still considering the offer but he wanted to live this normal life without danger for a while.

* * *

He saw his friends on the television once again when they fought off Ultron, the advanced robot with god complex. The Avengers won the fight and gained their new allies.

After that brutal battle, they had a celebration party at Avengers Tower. Sam was invited along with the close companion of every heroes.

But the most noticeable thing was there was something going on between Steve and Natasha. It's not that unnoticeable but it was more of the most subtle way. It was not that surprised for him to see them gravitate around one another or even saw Steve dotting and protecting her. But this time, it was different from what he previously knew.

This time, Natasha was the one who clung to Steve's side all the time. From what he heard from the team, Steve was badly injured by a laser blast from Ultron and he almost died in a fight but he brought Natasha and Tony an opportunity to dismantle Ultron and destroy it.

Natasha didn't let him out of her sight for once after that. Even she said it was her promise to Steve and his trust on her with his life. Sam always knew it was more than but he kept his suspicion all to himself.

Two weeks later after the party, It was a breaking news all over the television. A photo of Steve and Natasha kissing on the dance floor during Stark's annual charity. The confirmation everyone was waiting for. They were officially dating.

The couple visited him every weekend. Sam took this opportunity to ask them when they started the relationship.

"Two months after DC. Clint and I tracked her down."

"He came to find me and brought me back to New York and after that we started to get close and spend a lot of time together and he asked me out on a date but we tried our best to keep it a secret."

"But what make you guys decide to reveal your relationship to the world?"

"Stark planned to have like ten girls for Steve that night and he aimed for six of them to be in Steve's bed that night." Natasha replied and rolled her eyes when she thought about it.

"So we decided the only way to stop this madness is to reveal our relationship."

Sam was okay with it. If his friends was happy, he was happy too.

* * *

To be honest, he should be surprised to receive a wedding invitation from Steve and Natasha five months after they announced to the world that they were in a relationship. They wedding was quiet as they wanted even Stark insisted that he could close the entire central park and hosted their wedding with a thousand of guests.

Their wedding held on the helicarrier floating in the ocean resembled the place they first met. It was Natasha's idea (Part of her wanted to keep all the news reporter at bay and this could serve as their cover as they were aboard the helicarrier for their mission.)

The ceremony was beautiful and everyone was happy. They held a party at Avengers Tower before they went for a honeymoon tomorrow.

But this time the plan wasn't according to what the couple had planned. Fury needed them in and said that he had a very important information of the current whereabouts of the Winter Soldier. The newlywed couple agreed on this and that was how Steve got his best friend back.

From what Sam heard from Natasha, she and Steve was planning their next honeymoon trip and this time she forbid everyone to give her and Steve a mission for a month or she and Steve will magically disappear without a trace.

* * *

Well, back to his story. Sam just came back from a dinner date with this lovely girl but then he heard a knock from a window.

"What the hell?" Sam muttered when he saw two shadows outside his window.

He slid his window opened and saw Natasha and Steve stood outside covered in dirt, charcoal dust, and blood. A nostalgia hit Sam because this scene right in front of him resembled when he first found the couple, on the run from HYDRA and needed a place to lay low.

"Hey, man. Sorry about this but we need a place to lay low." Steve spoke up in the awkward silence.

"I thought you guys are on your way to your honeymoon." Sam said.

"Can we talk about this inside?" Nat asked

Sam stepped away to let them in and he checked outside the window one more time before he closed it. Natasha casually strode into his kitchen and began to rampage his fridge.

"Baby, can you cook something? I'm really starving."

"Yeah, of course." Steve replied with a smile.

"Hey, before you two having your dinner, tell me what the fuck is going on here?!" Sam yelled to stop his two superhero friends.

Natasha sighed and sat down at the countertop, "Well, we headed out for our honeymoon but Russian mafia showed up and start shooting at our car."

"We made a very narrow escape and went straight to your home."

"How did you survived that much bullet?"

"Someone cannot leave his shield at home even when we are heading for the honeymoon."

Steve rolled his eyes, "Someone strapped her gun at her thigh and thought that I didn't notice it."

"Hey! You just notice it when you went down on me at the back of the limo!" Natasha argued.

Sam quickly covered his ears, "I DON' NEED TO HEAR IT! And stayed as long as you want!"

"Thanks, man." Steve said

"But prepare your wings. We might have an attack from the Russian mafia."

"You say what now?" Sam frowned.

The couple just laughed and resumed to make their meal. Truth to be told, Sam didn't wear his wing again after the incident back in New York. After the suit was destroy, Stark offered to build a new one but he declined because he knew it his heart he will not be able to resist fight crime again if he had the wings with him.

The couple adjourned to the guest bedroom right after the meal. They were obviously tried and needed a rest. What Sam wasn't prepare for was when he walked into the room and saw the couple 'wrestling' under the blanket.

"OH!" Sam covered his eyes "I don't need to see it. I just want to tell you that there is an extra pillow and blanket are in that cupboard."

"Get out, Wilson." Natasha growled from under the blanket.

"This is the first time did it in my guest bedroom, right?"

"Sam, we are in the middle of something here." Steve said and a few lose moans came from the captain as Natasha moved and stuck her head out of the blanket.

"This is the second time we did it. Last time was ages ago."

Sam muttered something before he walked out of the room and left the couple alone. Natasha turned back to her husband with a smirk on her lips.

"Now…where were we?"

* * *

The couple ended up spending the entire weekend at Sam's house before Sam had enough and called Stark to pick Natasha and Steve up.

"You must take them to their honeymoon destination right now." Sam told Tony with the most serious face.

"What did you guys did to him?" Tony asked the couple before a realization hit him. "You two traumatized Wilson with your sexy activity right?! Don't worry, man, they were much worse than this when they did it back in the tower."

And Sam got his chance to tell his nephew about the honeymoon incident nine months later when Steve and Natasha welcomed their first child.

Sam was holding James in his arms surrounded by the Avengers in the living room of the Tower while the parents was cooking dinner for everyone.

"James, do you know you were conceive at my guest bedroom when your mom and dad decided to choose my home as their honeymoon destination?"

"SAM!" Steve and Natasha yelled at Sam at the same time.

* * *

**-Please kindly leave a review**

**\- There will be a next chapter**


	2. Chapter 2

**2 : The Flying Avengers**

It was a perfect peaceful Sunday for Sam. He just came back from his morning run, having a very nice and hot breakfast, take a long shower, and ended up in front of his new kick ass couch, courtesy of Steve and Natasha who feel the need to repay for Sam's hospitality.

"You guys don't have to take me here."

"Well, Steve never come here so two birds with one bullet." Natasha replied casually.

"You never been to IKEA?" Sam turned to Steve

"I don't have time. Besides, JARVIS can order anything that we want. And to be honest, it was Natasha who didn't want to go out when we actually have free time."

The married couple ended up arguing about this for an hour while Sam testing the couch and found the one he likes. The argument ended up with Natasha won the debate as always.

So, this new couch was really suit for his new play station and his kick ass television. It was his Madden time when a door bell ring interrupting his fun.

"Why are you here, Stark?" Sam frowned when he saw the billionaire superhero with a duffle bag on his shoulder. "I thought you have like a dozen of house in the States."

Sam even saw the red sport car parking at the street way in front of his house.

"Well, Pepper threw me out of my house and Rhodey's on vacation in Mexico. I have nowhere else to go and Steve and Natasha said your house is the best place to lay low so…."

_DAMN IT, Steve and Natasha!_ Sam cursed in his mind.

"Why exactly did Miss Potts kicked you out of your own house?"

"Can you just let me inside?"

"Nah, until you tell me why she kicked you out."

Tony narrowed his eyes before replied, "I blew up my bedroom with a stink bomb."

Sam's eyes widened before bursting into laughter. He laughed so hard he needed to clutch his stomach and leaned against the door frame for the support.

"Glad I can make you laugh." Tony rolled his eyes, "Can I come in now?"

Sam stepped out of the way to let Tony in before he closed the door. The billionaire tossed his bag on the couch and popped down on it as if this was his own place.

"I also bring you the latest games. Some of them doesn't even come up yet. Wanna give it a try?"

"Hell yeah!"

They ended up with dozen of games in one day and they barely left the couch. Sam order six boxes of pizza for them and he had food laid around the area so they could fully enjoy the game without hitting the pause button too much.

"So...you want me to upgrade your wings for ya?" Tony asked.

"I knew this day will come. Steve had been try to warn me that you will offer this."

"Can you explain why he had to warn you about me?"

"Well, you tend to create something crazy for your teammates." Sam explained "Like the one time you have everyone in your team wore a hello kitty pink uniform and those photos are still all over the internet."

"That one time is for the charity!" Tony half yelled, "Every single penny went straight to many charities."

"That one time Natasha told me that you changed Hawkeye's explosive arrows into a blast of confetti and a blast of Bohemian Rhapsody."

"He left me no choice. He uploaded Justin Bieber's song into my armor! My ACDC opening theme song into Justin Bieber's song."

"Which song?"

"Every single one of it"

Sam laughed again, "And also the one time you 'tinkering' with Thor's hammer and it almost electrocute everyone in the tower including me."

"Fine, just consider my offer."

* * *

**_Three days later._**

DING DONG!

"Hey, you're Sam Wilson, right?"

"Yeah"

"I'm looking for Tony Stark. Is he here?"

"It depends on who you are."

"I'm Lieutenant Colonel James Rhodes, friend of Tony Stark. I'm here to drag him back to New York."

"Oh! Colonel Rhodes, please come inside. Tony's here."

Rhodey followed Sam back inside and found Tony laying on the couch with a screwdriver in his hands and a wing pack placed on the coffee table.

"He finally convinced you to let him upgrade your suit, isn't he?"

"Yeah, he was begging me for two days and bribed me with upgrading my game console and give me the latest game in the market."

"Hope he didn't cause you any trouble."

"No, no, he's surprisingly behave himself."

"Guys! I'm trying to sleep here." Tony slurred sleepily

Rhodey sighed, "I come here to get you home, Tony. Pepper already forgive you."

"No! I want to stay with Sam!"  
"Don't act like a little baby, Tony"

"Can Sam come with us?"

"It's up to him."

"Nah, I think I will sit this one out." Sam said, "Pack up your thing and go home to your wife, Stark."


End file.
